My Advertisement

The ad I chose to write about is Walgreens Flu Shots “Arm Yourself for the ones you love.” It’s a very simple ad however it gets the message through to viewers. The ad target’s all individuals to receive their flu shots every year. Yes the content and design of the ad follows all the guidelines listed in Marchand’s article. The designer incorporated enough information to inspire viewers without overloading their view. I found my ad in a Women’s Health magazine, however, this advertisement is seen EVERYWHERE. You can find it on billboards, at Walgreens stores, and on commercials. The purpose of the advertisement is for a good cause and the phrases used can be very inspiring for individuals.

Elements of an Effective Layout

In the article “Elements of an Effective Layout,” author Dorothy Cohen uses several analytical tools in order for viewers to understand an advertisement. These elements consist of balance, proportion, movement, utility, clarity and emphasis. I think the most important would be balance and proportion. If I come across an advertisement where the main focus is specifically on one side and the image(s) and text(s) are not proportional with each other, it throws me off. It’s unprofessional like to have an advertisement looking this way. The least important would have to be emphasis. I feel like it just sums up what the other elements together consist of.

Democracy of Goods

The main goal of an advertisement is to get consumers to buy the product making it as fordable as possible. “The wonders of modern mass production and distribution enabled everyone to enjoy society’s most desirable pleasures, conveniences, or benefits.” (Marchand 213) The Democracy of Goods implies that advertisements show off the rich and wealthy knowing that the average Joes will fall for the ad to be “just like them.” I believe the Democracy of Goods is used in today’s advertising. 

Advertising

When thinking about successful commercial advertisements, the first thing that comes to mind is Coke commercials. I don’t recall every watching a Coke commercial and not liking it. They always seem to have a unique creative plot behind to finding of Coke. The commercials follow all the proper elements listed in Marchand’s article; balance, proportion, movement, utility, clarity and emphasis.

On the other hand, there is one company whose commercials I can NOT stand….Geico. I’ve never understood the relationship between the plot of the commercials and the company’s products. Their commercials come off as stupid and unprofessional like to me.

Persuasive Essay Summary

My thesis statement is mastectomies are more affective than lumpectomies. Main arguments I included in my essay were examples as to why mastectomies are the way to go, pros mastectomies contain, and the lifelong aspects they bring. Counterarguments used were examples of women who endured a lumpectomy, pros lumpectomies brought HOWEVER that they are not a lifelong cure to breast cancer.

Research

Works Cited

"Permission to Live My Dream: All It Took Was Breast Cancer | No Boobs About It." Breast Cancer Blog: No Boobs About It – Navigating Breast Cancer. Web. 24 Oct. 2011. <http://noboobsaboutit.com/about/>.

"Probability of Breast Cancer in American Women - National Cancer Institute." Comprehensive Cancer Information - National Cancer Institute. Web. 24 Oct. 2011. <http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/factsheet/detection/probability-breast-cancer>

“Mastectomy: MedlinePlus." National Library of Medicine - National Institutes of Health. Web. 24 Oct. 2011. <http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/mastectomy.html#cat27>

"Mastectomy vs. Lumpectomy." BreastCancer.org - Breast Cancer Treatment Information and Pictures. Web. 24 Oct. 2011. <http://www.breastcancer.org/treatment/surgery/mast_vs_lump.jsp>

"Breast Cancer Guide - Treatment." Continuum Heath Partners - Homepage. Web. 24 Oct. 2011. <http://www.chpnyc.org/directory/combsite/treat.html>

"History of Breast Cancer." THE MEDICAL NEWS | from News-Medical.Net - Latest Medical News and Research from Around the World. Web. 24 Oct. 2011. <http://www.news-medical.net/health/History-of-Breast-Cancer.aspx>

"Lumpectomy." BreastCancer.org - Breast Cancer Treatment Information and Pictures. Web. 24 Oct. 2011.

<http://www.breastcancer.org/treatment/surgery/lumpectomy/>

Style

After reading “An Approach to Style (With a List of Reminders)” the one that spoke out to me the most was #6. Do not overwrite. I find myself adding in unnecessary words just to get the point across. Sentences don’t need to be lengthy to make a point/statement. Although not a lot of suggestions were made, it is the only thing I struggle with the most when writing papers. I agree when they say to reread your writing later and delete excess wording.

Effective Argument

Martin Luther King, Jr. is addressing all Americans. In his letter, he is addressing his beliefs and struggles he is facing. Back then, change wasn’t spoken of. It didn’t matter what the person’s race, skin color, religion, etc was… peers weren’t going to change. The tone of this letter was very informative coming across as an upset man. I think Martin Luther King, Jr.’s letter was very effective. Nowadays, racism is rarely seen and different racial groups are interacting together. Color isn’t the main key to friendships, jobs, etc; it’s a person’s personality and aspects towards life. Throughout his letter, King uses several logical fallacies as well as ethos, pathos and logos among his arguments.  Begging the question was used when King was trying to get the message out that just because some are colored, doesn’t mean they aren’t capable of being as good as whites. Blacks should have equal rights as do whites. The color of one’s skin should reflect one’s freedom. Either-or fallacies were used when King was expressing that changes be made now or our peers will stay the same.  

Logical Fallacies

I could have made it to work on time if I didn’t have to stop and get gas.

This is an example of rationalization. This is a very weak explanation as to why one was late for work. Regardless of the excuse, they could’ve easily left a little early to stop and get gas and still make it to work on time.

I can speed even though it will risk a fine because everyone else does it.

This is an example of a bandwagon appeal because assumptions are being made that everyone else who drives speeds therefore making it okay that they speed as well. However, in reality, not everyone out there driving speeds. It could be that their friends/family speeds so they need to “fit in” making the thought more agreeable.

Only females can become nurses.

This is an example of polarization. This might’ve been the case several years ago however in today’s society, a male can be just as good of a nurse as a female. Even though female nurses are more commonly seen, males are just as capable of becoming a nurse as well.

Topic

The topic I chose to write about is “why mastectomies are better than lumpectomy’s.” I think this is a very serious topic when it comes to those suffering from breast cancer. I’ve done research about my thesis as well as have had a personal experience with a family member who chose a mastectomy. Some examples through research indicate that with mastectomies, cancer is at a lower to none risk of returning whereas with lumpectomies the risk is greater for the cancer to return there for then having to undergo another surgery and receive a mastectomy. There are many reasons to my thesis that I think will affect those who are placed with the question to choose one or the other. Besides the research, I think with my personal experience, I can include personal opinions from myself as well as my mother who experienced it to help influence others.

My Opinion

I work at a retail pharmacy and decisions are made continuously. There are several instances where a patient drops of a prescription and comes back later to pick it up being informed that we currently don’t have that medication in stock. As techs, we see instances like this differently. Some would leave the prescription alone and deal with it when the patient returns, others would call other pharmacies to see if they have that certain medication in stock, while others would directly order the medication from our warehouse so we could keep the patients business and fill their prescription in 2 to 3 days when the medications arrives. In my opinion, I suggest to all techs that we check each medication for each prescription making sure it’s in stock before the patient’s leaves so problems don’t get piled up. I voice my opinion about this particular problem because as a business, I look at it as being better to order a medication and filling it in the next couple of days rather than calling other pharmacies and wind up losing business. I work with techs who are all for my thoughts and ideas while others are totally against it and only care about not upsetting the patient whether we lose their business or not.

"Muddiest Point"

                I think this assignment is pretty straight forward. The instructions and guidelines were very clear and thorough. I understand what’s expected for this essay, when the due dates are and the layout required.

            The “muddiest point” for me to conquer for this assignment is going to be choosing a topic. Since this essay is a minimum of five pages, I have to make sure I pick a topic where I can expand my knowledge on to fill those pages. The instructions for choosing a specific topic were clear giving examples of certain topics to stay away from.

            One thing that I think would’ve been helpful would’ve been some sample topics to get us on track to picking a successful topic. Another thing that would’ve been helpful is a sample essay so we students could see the layout and flow of an essay with these guidelines. I find it useful to look back on a sample essay to make sure organization and flow is proper.

Personal Narrative- Notaro

·        I was grabbed by the introduction. It was fairly short with not a lot of detail but the phrase “no way out of it” that the writer used is what kept me interested.

·        I liked how the writer focused her attention talking about her Pop Pop than she did herself. She still based her story specifically on trips to the grocery store with her Pop Pop.

·        There was very good sensory details given. I was able to catch on and see each characters personality. It was clear that their Pop Pop was a very self-minded, heard headed type of guy. While his wife, Nana, was stricter and didn’t put up with a lot of Pop Pop’s gestures.

·        The writer incorporated great dialogue. It made readers feel like they were along for the ride experiencing all the different excitements Pop Pop brought to the table for his family.

·        I thought the writer’s placement of events made the story itself flow good. It kept the story interesting by talking about small simple errands and then leading up to the big dreading errand that the whole family tried to get out of. I was able to connect with the writer because my grandpa himself was always hard headed, loved to joke around and be a smartass.

·        The writer gave readers great details to use to be able to know the types of relationships the writer had with her grandparents and the errands that were ran on a daily/weekly basis.

·        The story was concluded with the way her and Pop Pops grocery errand ended. It pulled all the parts together and fully brought out Pop Pops personality. Without the dialogue that was used, I don’t think readers would’ve been able to visualize Pop Pop and his stubborn, risky personality and it wouldn’t have been as interesting.

Personal Narrative- White

·         I was a little bored with the introduction. There were good sensory details however I felt like the writer was dragging on with the sentences and would’ve been fine leaving some words out. The writer talked about an adventure but didn’t give it all away in the introduction which kept me reading to see what all went on during the adventure.

·         Even though the introduction was about the writer when he was little going on a camping trip with his father, he still only talks about a fishing trip however the roles are flipped around now that the writer’s a father taking his son on a camping trip.

·         Yes sensory details were present. The writer did a good job informing readers how similar his trip with his son was with his trip with his father when he was his son’s age.  I was able to visualize myself going on a camping trip like the writers.

·         It would’ve been helpful to include dialogue, but the writer chose not to use any. I think the writer used enough descriptive details about all the activities they did while on the trip that dialogue necessarily didn’t have to be incorporated.

·         I myself can relate because camping has always been an interest for me and my family. As for those who aren’t so fond of camping, I think it would be hard for one to connect with. This is where the writer’s good descriptions of the activities performed became helpful for who have never been camping before to get the feel of what fun it can be.

·         The writer explains how close of a relationship him and his father had and how it resembles to relationship him and his son now have and how close the camping trip brought them together.

·         In the end, the writer talks about how much his son resembles him as a kid with the choices and actions made. I thought the conclusion kind of lacked in completing the story. I was a little confused and left hanging but overall I understood the main point in the story.

Personal Narrative- Sedaris

·         I thought the introduction fit well. It was interesting and kept me reading more. The writer talked about minor details of their experience that led to more specific instances faced in their experience in French class.

·         Yes the story was specifically focused on an experience the writer had in French class while returning to school at the age of 41. If the story was about the writer’s entire life, they would’ve incorporated their family/friends, likes/dislikes, hobbies/jobs, etc.

·         I can visualize the dialogue and how the writer felt misplaced at first because of his age and lack of knowledge of French. I could understand that the teacher was very stubborn and hear how the dialogue was said in tone.

·         I thought the writer incorporated very descriptive dialogue. It was easy to comprehend and placement was good. If a sentence was unclear, the dialogue helped clear what was really going taking place.

·         I think every student (new or returning) can relate to this story in some way. Some are shyer than others but I think everyone’s experienced a class in their educational career where they’ve felt uncomfortable and/or had an intimidating teacher.

·         Yes the writer described his teacher’s personality and teaching styles making it difficult for students to do well. In the end, the writer talks about how he finally realized that he understood what his fellow classmates were talking about and started catching on, putting his teacher’s rude comments behind and believing.

·         I thought the conclusion was different than more because it ended in dialogue. However, it was correctly chosen and flowed with concluding the story. It did leave readers hanging because it didn’t finish with the writer finishing the class but the main part was the fear of fitting in, knowing how to speak French and getting along with the teacher. The dialogue between the writer and the teacher answered how all three of those listed above turned out.

Sentence Variety

Driving to the mall in her car, Sam went to the shoe store and bought a pair of boots and a shoeshine kit. Next, she went to the food court and ordered a burrito containing onions and peppers. While eating her burrito, Sam saw a cute boy at the pretzel stand. She began blushing once he looked at her and started walking her way. As he approached, Sam said hi. The boy quickly gagged and walked away. Shocked by the response, Sam noticed her bad breath, ran to the bathroom and bursted into tears. Gaining confidence, Sam applied some shine to her new boots and proudly walked out of the bathroom. Finding the boy, Sam informed him that he needed manners. Adding a kick with her new boots, the boy fell to the ground; Sam walked away, and left the mall.

Mechanics

In the majority of my writings, I constantly tend to include unnecessary words to my sentences. I find it helpful when I reread my writings to see if anything “better” comes to mind. With this problem, it tends to make sentences sound choppy and inconsistent. According to “The Elements of Style Book”, one should active voice to make writing more direct and vigorous. Strength in my writings is keeping related words closely together. If related words aren’t placed together, sentences tend to sound unevenly spaced and can sometimes be confusing to readers.  Placement is the key to proper writing.

Blog #5 "Summary Revision Checklist"

1. What is the thesis statement? Is it an accurate reflection of the author’s thesis

statement? Is it stated in your own words? How could you refine it to be more clear

and concise?

My thesis statements is: The ways individuals change their lifestyle in order to cope with the pressures and responsibilities college brings in life.

2. How is the essay introduced? Do you mention the article’s title, author, purpose and

audience? Does it clearly set the tone for the paper and accurately reflect what is

discussed therein? Could it be improved?

I introduced my summary with an example of a normal college student experiencing a day in college.

3. What are the main points of the summary? How do you recognize them? Do you

leave out minor points and repetitive points for emphasis? Most importantly, do you

leave out your own opinion, feelings or conclusions on the subject of the article?

The main points in my summary cover the four pressures we discussed in blog. I chose to focus on these throughout my entire essay because we as college students deal with one if not more of these types of pressures every day. I implied not only examples of each pressure but examples that I have experienced throughout my college days.

4. How is the essay organized? Does it follow the organization of the original article?

What transitions do you use? Think of some additional possibilities for more logical

organization.

I mixed it up and tried as much as possible to separate each type of pressure so they each had their own paragraph. Throughout the summary, I incorporated different examples, each one dealing with the four types of pressures to keep the minds of readers open.

5. After your reading, can you say the thesis statement accurately reflects the topic and

focus of the essay? How is the essay concluded? What technique do you employ in

the conclusion? How is that effective or not?

I believe my thesis was accurate throughout my summary. I concluded with advice of my own as well as ways I think are helpful for current and future students when they start dealing with these pressures.

6. Make sure to fix any major grammar, spelling, or punctuation errors.

7. Is the sentence structure varied and interesting? Do you have any weak, overly

wordy, awkward, or confusing sentences? Does the essay strive to use active, direct,

present tense verbs?

I feel like my wording structure and variety was well chosen. My examples may have been a little over wordy but I wanted to make sure readers understood what I was trying to show and explain.

8. Were the textual passages (quotes and paraphrases) well-chosen? Remember you

should try avoiding direct quotations when writing a summary.

I didn’t use a lot of quotes from the actual story that was in the book. With the ones I did include in my summary, they followed along with my summary and the examples that were used.

9. Is the essay written in third-person? Are all instances of first- and second-person

removed from the piece?

I tried keeping my summary in third person. However, it became a little tougher with some the examples I provided but I did the best I could.

10. Is the draft two to three (2-3) pages typed, double-spaced? Are all the margins one inch

(1”)?

Blog #4 "College Pressures"

I think it’s safe to say that most Freshman’s number one fear walking on campus is “Am I going to find the right classroom on time.” Starting off with my first year of college, and getting use to the campus and classroom environment, I can’t really say that I encountered a lot of pressures. If anything, it would be societal pressures. There’s always that fear of making new friends. How friendly campus students are, what group you fit in with, from athletics to sororities/fraternities, etc.

Sophomore year of college, I’ve gotten a better understanding of how much money is involved with college. Financial aid gets reimbursed (if you qualify), more loans are taken out, room and board is paid, and books are purchased. All these requirements for starting a new school year require the help of parents. My parents have always been there to support me. However, I’ve grown up and have been able to support myself for the most part (i.e. gas in the car, money for food, setting up necessary appointments, etc.). College has opened up my eyes to making sure I earn the grades I need so all this money is well spent.

Now that I’m in my junior year of college, you have to start buckling down and setting priorities to earning that degree you’ve always dreamed about receiving. I will be applying for nursing school this Fall and have to make sure my grades are where they need to be so my chances of being accepted are good. This is the time where social activities are lessened each day, and more time is being dedicated to school work and study time. Parent’s words are more meaningful to you, which adds more pressure to you to want to succeed. Peer pressure is very high because they still want you to go out and have fun, but you have to stay strong and get your priorities right.

Looking back on the two years that I have completed in college, I would now say that all four of these pressures are in some way put on you from the first day. With the economy the way it is, it is more cruitial than ever to have a college degree, which is added pressure. It is very difficult for the middle class families to put their children through college, because they make too much money to qualify for grants, however, with the expense of college, it is hard to pay for it and still make a living. So typically, the only choice is to become indebted with student loans. I believe that peer and societal pressures could be intertwined together because you want to hang out with your friends, however, you also need to do well in class in order to graduate, find a good job and eventually do well in society.

Blog #3 "University Days"

While attending Jr. High School, I was in a math class I will never forget in all my school years. I was in 7^th grade, and of course math was a required subject. On top of being a nervous 7^th grader, I got stuck with the worst teacher, Mrs. McNish, a student could have. Homework assignments began being assigned and I quickly began to fall behind. With teaching skills of assigning homework first, and then teaching the material (seemed a little backwards), I was quickly falling behind and almost failing the class. My parents helped as much as possible, and my dad is very good at Algebra, however, they felt the teacher was not fulfilling her teaching duties, so my dad attempted to communicate with her via email waiting days with no reply. Back then, there was a program, PowerSchool for teachers to communicate student’s grade information. Teachers could input students daily work grades to keep parents updated on their students class work. Parent teacher conferences arrived and Mrs. McNish informed my parents that she wasn’t very computer literate and also didn’t have the time to communicate through email as well as keeping grades posted in PowerSchool. After exhausting all resources my parents requested that the principle assign me to a different teacher for the next semester. This proved to be the appropriate action. I went from almost failing and not understanding anything to being taught material, doing homework and receiving an A in the class.

Blog #2 "On Keeping A Notebook"

I agree with Didion when referring to a notebook as “keeping in touch.” I think it sums up the everyday use and purpose of having a notebook. It’s a way for one to get things off their mind/chest that might be bugging them, or to just simply jot down memories they want to treasure so they can one day look back on; for one to remember the good times with friends and family. Sometimes a notebook can be used to write vigorously when having a bad day. To some, writing is a way to get rid of bad so it’s not holding on and continuously dragging one down.

I personally do not own a notebook of my own; however I have friends that write daily in their journals. In my eyes, I look at a journal as being one’s hobby/ lifestyles; expressing one’s personality. A journal can be related to many other things/ways people can express their emotions, thoughts and feelings. Instead of having a journal, some might draw out their thoughts and emotions, while others turn to friends/family to let it all out. Whether it’s physical or verbal, I believe that everyone should have some type of “journal” in their lives where they can feel comfortable in sharing their feelings, thoughts and emotions, rather than holding them inside.

Today’s technology has allowed the social media to skyrocket. With the establishments of chat sites such as Facebook and Twitter, via the internet, millions of viewers post there life daily. One could look at these chat sites in a positive or negative way. In the positive aspect, they allow you to keep in touch with distant relatives and friends. However, the negative side is that so many people out there post their entire life, making them vulnerable to bad individuals.

Blog #1 "About Me"

Hey guys! My name is Lynzie Heiniger and I'm 20 years old. I'm currently a junior at Washburn University. I'm applying this fall for the school of nursing hoping to seek my career with a BSN from Washburn and later with an RN. I've lived in Topeka my whole life and am currently working at a retail pharmacy as well as a golf course. With the free time that I have, I like to catch up with friends and family. I'm enrolled in this course because it's required for a student to take before they are capable of graduating. I look forward to being in this class and getting to know my classmates!